Memories of a Stray
by Dreams Bleed Ink
Summary: "Renji, they want to adopt me into the Kuchiki family," Rukia said to me. How incredible were those words. How impossible. And yet, how right. The star would at last take her place beside the moon in the sky. I did not try to pursue her. For how could a stray dog pursue a star? - Short ficlets from Renji's POV, Rukia execution arc, with quotes from manga chapters 59 and 98.
1. The Stray, the Star and the Moon

***Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach.***

The Stray, the Star and the Moon

South Rukongai, Area 78 "Inuzuri." In that town that's little better than a dumpster where the people are worse than trash, I found a star. Or rather, a star found us, crashing into our lives with little warning. From that day on, we were always together… We were family.

Our family began with five. But in that town little better than a dumpster where the people are worse than trash, our family slowly dwindled, one heartbreaking death after another, until there was only her and me.

One day, Rukia and I stood silently on the hill where we buried our friends, both our tears long since shed and dried over ten long years of watching them die one by one. Rukia gazed at the distant horizon, over the treetops of the forest at the edge of Inuzuri. She often looked into the distance, as if she could see things others could not. Rukia had always had that aura of gentle wisdom about her which set her apart from everyone in that dumpster of a town.

"Renji, let's become shinigami," she said in her soft, low voice. And I followed the star.

We were both gifted, she and I. We rose swiftly to the top of our class. But amongst the company of the children of nobility, we could never forget from where we came. But we had each other. No matter how hard things got, we were never alone.

Then one day, **he** came into our lives. I first saw him in the halls of our dorm, as unexpected a sight as if the moon itself deigned to descend from the sky to converse with us. He was speaking to Rukia, his face pale and serene. When his retainers noticed my approach, my unwanted presence, they broke off their conversation and drifted away. He never once glanced at me, I was so far beneath his notice.

"Renji, they want to adopt me into the Kuchiki family," Rukia said to me, her voice full of uncertainty. It took a few moments for the meaning to sinking in.

How incredible were those words. How impossible. And yet, how right. The star would at last take her place beside the moon in the sky. She had always had that aura which set her apart from everyone from that dumpster of a town, my Rukia. Everyone including me.

Rukia whispered hesitantly, "Renji… I…" There should not have been sadness on her face and hesitation in her words. She belonged in the sky with the moon, pale and serene. This was right. This was meant to be. Don't get in her way.

I plastered a wide fake smile on my face and congratulated her, drowning both our doubts with loud, meaningless words. I even laughed and slapped my hand down on her shoulder, same as always. But of course, by my own words, my very own damned, noble words, nothing would ever be the same again. Rukia reached up for my arm, her hand warm and small, and gently freed herself from my touch. She was a Kuchiki now, and I could no longer touch her.

It would be many years before we touched again. We, who had always been together. We, who had been family.

"Thank you," Rukia whispered. She didn't meet my eyes as she drifted away. In that moment, she already resembled you in her remoteness. I did not try to pursue her. For how could a stray dog pursue a star?


	2. The Stray Barking at the Star

The Stray Barking at the Star

On the last day you spoke to me as an orphan and walked away from me as a Kuchiki, I did not try to pursue you. I knew full well that a star belongs in the sky with the moon. But that did not stop me from hating that moon beside you. I hated him for being everything I was not, for having everything I did not.

Ever since you left, I trained everyday, so that one day I would be stronger than him and become a beast as powerful as the monsters of old. Powerful enough to swallow up that wretched moon.

Maybe then, I would have the courage to jump for the star.

Maybe then, Rukia, I …


	3. The Stray Howling at the Moon

The Stray Howling at the Moon

Until I had enough courage to jump and bite at the moon, until the day comes when I was strong enough to defeat you, I could only surrender Rukia unto your protection. Everyday since you took her from my side, I trained and sharpened my teeth, waiting for that day to come. And after every defeat by your hands in our training sessions, I consoled myself with the thought that at least she had a brother who cared for her. I imagined her in the sort of home she and I always dreamed of, when we used to sleep in the cold, filthy alleys of Inuzuri.

So tell me why Rukia is sitting in jail now, saying to me with such a sad expression on her face that you would be the one to kill her yourself.

Tell me why she is telling me that over the 40 years since she was adopted by the Kuchiki family, you never even once truly looked at her.

Did you only give her a house, and never a home? Tell me I have not been lying to myself these past 40 years.

Tell me I did not abandon her.

Tell me I did not leave her all alone.

TELL ME, KUCHIKI!


	4. The Stray's Pride

The Stray's Pride

When you're a nobody without a single dime to your name, all you have is your in-born pride.

But for her life, I would be willing to trample on my pride, ground it into the dirt and beg like a shameless dog.

So Kurosaki, please…


End file.
